Rising From The Ashes
by freedomnova
Summary: It has been almost twelve years since the bombs hit. The war is over and Cheyenne fell leaving behind a country slowly putting itself back together. Jace fought in the war, but was injured and has no memory of who he used to be. He is happy with his life, but he can't stop the dreams. Dreams of a girl waiting in a town, calling out to him pleading with him to come home.
1. Chapter 1

He groaned as the alarm sounded waking him from his sleep. It seemed no matter how much sleep he got it didn't matter he never fully felt rested. Dreams always seemed to wake him through the night and even when he didn't wake it seemed his dreams would leave him feeling exhausted. He was tempted to hit the snooze button and ignore his adult responsibilities but he knew he couldn't. He rolled over and looked up at the ceiling as his mind tried to remember what his dreams were about. The doctor said PTSD from the war and his accident but sometimes a few he wished he could see them clearly. Most of those dreams he was happy he couldn't see clearly. He could see flashes of fighting and shooting, bombs exploding and people dying. Those were the dreams he wanted to forget, but sometimes it seemed he had a few moments of peace in his dreams. Sometimes he saw golden hair flash across his mind and light brown eyes. He tried to hold onto the image in his mind, but it was no use no matter how hard he tried all he saw over and over again was her hair color, her eyes and sometimes if he was lucky her smile. He spoke to a doctor about it once and the doctor told him that the person he thought he saw in his mind might just be a dream. That even if she had been real the odds were she wasn't around anymore.

The world had changed. It wasn't what it once was and trying to find someone from before the war was near impossible if you didn't have memories of where you came from. He had no memories of the war and what happened leading up to it. He woke up from his accent and that was all he remembered, his time since waking up but not before never before. He was told it happened a lot in times of war especially this last war. So many people trying to find their way homes after all the fighting. People got lost in the system mostly the ones with injuries like his, ones where he couldn't remember who he once was. He couldn't tell his doctors who he was or where he came from. He knew he could never go home even if he had wanted to. There were times he felt urges to get in his car and drive moments he thought about driving an urge to just go home. Mostly after he had been drinking and every time he felt a part of him sink and break when he realized he didn't know where home was. What home was. He wondered if he had a family, if there was anyone out there that loved him and hoped he would return from war one day but he knew he never would.

And at times that broke him the moment his mind thought of someone or perhaps more the none person waiting for him wishing him to come home. It had been five years since the war ended and almost twelve since the bombs divided a nation. In those five years he wondered how long it took for those that cared about him to realize he wasn't coming home. Often he wondered if he even had people waiting for him, why did he seem to believe there really was someone out there waiting for him. In all truth not many people had family left many people died in the war and even before after the bombs first went off. Yet something told him had someone out there, a family.

It took him a while to open up to the idea that he wasn't going to ever figure out who he was. The doctors thought his memory loss might be temporary but after five years he doubted it would eve come back. When he came to terms with that he was able to move on. He started a new life and tried to leave the ideas of remembering who he used to be in his past. Most of the time he knew he could pretend he didn't care yet times like when he first woke up and rolled over as if he was expecting to find someone next to him reminded him that there was a past out there that he lost. Even when he woke up next to his fiancé he would feel like it wasn't right, that she wasn't supposed to be laying next to him. He always chased that idea from his mind almost as soon as it came to his mind.

He loved his fiancé she was the first person to really make him smile the first person that made him start feeling much of anything. They started out as friend and it slowly became more. She got past all his mental shields and she seemed to understand that from time to time when he had a lost look on his face she just had to take his hand and smile at her. In those moments he would always look at her and smiled back trying not to think that her smile was wrong, her hair was wrong and her eyes were wrong.

"Jace!" He heard his fiancé voice call from down stairs. "Breakfast!"

He sighed and pushed his covers off as he swung his legs over the side of the bed he winced as a sharp pain shot up his back. Ever since he woke up from the accident he had the pain. The doctors told him his was lucky to feel it his injuries usually meant someone couldn't walk they told him he was lucky, but moments like right now he didn't feel lucky.

"Jace!" She called again

"Coming!" He called as he glanced at himself in the mirror his eyes scanned his face as if trying to make sure he would remember what he looked like, as if he knew who he was.

"Is everything alright?" He heard her voice ask from the doorway.

Jace looked up and smiled, "Yeah sorry Sarah, just didn't sleep well."

She walked over to him and he could tell by the look on her face that she knew if wasn't a good morning. It was one of the mornings his mind latched on to the fact he couldn't remember who he was.

He saw the worry and understanding on her face she sat next to him and placed her hands on his. He smiled over at her and an imagine came to his mind of a girl. He was sitting on a porch and the girl from his dreams walked over to him. He tried to pretend like he was alright that he wasn't ready to knelt down in front of him as he tried not to meet her gaze. She placed her hands on his knees as she got close to him and then one hand on the top of his head and slid down to the left side of his neck and the other cupped the right side. She placed her forehead on his and he wrapped his warms around her holding her tight as he allowed himself to break down. She softly kissed the top of his head as she wrapped her hand in his hair and just hugged him.

He blinked as the image left his mind and he saw his fiancé again and forced a smile and made himself speak, "What's for breakfast?" He asked

She smiled at him and stood up. "Your favorite."

"I'll be right down." He told her.

She kissed him nodded her head and walked out of the room.

* * *

He walked with his arm over Sarah's shoulders as they walked through a car lot. They had agreed they needed a new car. Sarah and spoken about this car lot she saw on her way home from work and talked about how it was almost like how things were before the bombs. She told him life was starting to seem normal again, but he didn't even know what normal was. Now they walked around looking at car after car. Most claimed to be made after the bombs but none seemed to call out to him. Sarah spoke of how this one and that one reminded her of when she as growing up. The one they stood in front of now was what she called a family car. She started speaking of family and a future and he found his mind once again stuck on the past, a past he didn't know a past he couldn't remember. He let her talk to the man trying to sell them the SUV, but his mind was drifting away as his eyes scanned the crowd of people as if searching for someone. A blonde pony tale caught his attention. He felt everything in his body seem to stand at attention as he lost the girl in the crowd.

"I'll be right back." He quickly said without waiting for a response and hurried in the direction of the girl that caught his eye. It had only been the back of a woman's head but it had called out to him in a way as I he knew her. It was slow trying to get to where the girl was because so many people were around he had to push through the crowd. When he reached where he had seen her she was gone his eyes kept scanning the crowd but he saw no one he sighed as he shook his head feeling like an idiot chasing after the ghost from his dreams. He ran his hand through his hair and glanced at the car he now stood in front of. It spoke to him in a way no other car he had seen today did. Every car was the same color, same size even if the salesman said they were different. Nothing seemed to stand out to him except this one. It was covered in dust looking like it had sat in the lot for a long time. There was something about the car something that drew up in. He walked over to the driver side door and opened it surprised it wasn't locked. He slid inside the car as if he had done it one hundred times. He placed his hands on the steering wheel and smiled this was right, he was right sitting in this car.

"I don't think you want this car." He heard the salesman's voice say. He looked over and saw Sarah and the man looking at him.

Sarah was shaking her head. "This car was old even before the war."

"It's a nineteen sixty nine Roadrunner Plymouth." Jace felt himself saying even without thinking. He wondered how exactly he knew that. "It's a classic. Does it run?"

"Uh It might need a jump." The man said, "Honestly I don't know I didn't even know this car was here."

"I'll take it."

"Jace!" Sarah exclaimed, "We need to talk about this. We need a family car not some." She wrinkled her nose. "This, we will spend more money trying to keep it running."

Jace smirked as he popped the hood and stepped out of the car and opened it up to look at the motor. Some how he knew that it would be in good shape.

"It's a classic, if taken care of they will run forever." He told her. He didn't know how he knew what he was looking at, but he could tell that the motor had been rebuilt from the original that was put in when it was new.

"A car seat won't fit into it honey." She told him placing her hand on her stomach.

Jace looked down to see the slight bump starting to form under her shirt. He gave her a soft smile as he stood and closed the hood.

"You're right." He told her trying to hide the disappointment in his voice.

"If you follow me I have the perfect family car for you." The sales man said as he began walking away. Sarah quickly following him. Jace heard as their voices fell away talking about one of the newer cars he turned to follow when out of the corner of his eye it looked like a blonde woman was getting out of the car he had just been looking at. He turned back quickly only to realize his eyes had been playing tricks on him. He turned to leave again and walk away, but something deep within him still pulled at him to get the car.

"Sarah!" He called.

She turned from the salesman and back to him.

"I'm buying this car."

She frowned and he could tell it wasn't going to be a peaceful night, yet he knew that this car needed to be his, that he needed to buy this car.

* * *

He sighed as the door slammed in his face. He had a blanket and pillow in his arms. The argument over the car had gone both good and bad. He had bought the car and they drove home in silence. Once they got home and they were behind closed doors Sarah let her anger lose. Telling him that they could finally afford a car, life could get back to how it once was and he waisted the money on junk. He tried telling her it wasn't junk it was a classic, but she wouldn't listen. By the end of the argument she had thrown the pillow and blanket at him shoving him out the door and telling him to go sleep in the car. He turned away from the door and looked at the car in the drive way. He looked at all the houses down the road, every house was the same, every car was the same, but not this car. His car.

He smiled as he walked over to it. He opened the back door and tossed the pillow and blanket in the first time.

 _'_ _Well this won't be the first time I've slept in here.'_ He thought, but then he felt himself pause. He had never slept in this car, had he? Yet some how he couldn't help but remember laying down in the back seat a jacket as a blanket while he fell asleep. He closed the door which caused the glove compartment to open and got into the driver seat wondering if he should just drive to a motel. He looked over and saw the glove compartment was open. Reaching over he intended to close it but his eyes caught site of an envelope. Curious he pulled it out and opened it to see it was a hand written letter. He saw the writing was faded, but he could still make out most of the words.

 _If you are reading this I didn't make it out of Cheyenne. What I'm about to do may change the world, or it might just be foolish. Maybe I should have just stayed home instead of running strait for trouble. Maybe I should have stayed with Emily and just fought to keep Jericho safe. But I can't sit by and let this happen. I plan on going home and making sure everyone I care about is safe, but who am I kidding what we are about to do most likely won't end with me going home._

 _I know Emily will be waiting for me, she made me promise to come home, a promise I couldn't give her and wasn't foolish enough to. Yet I know her, I love her and she will need proof I'm not coming home. Let her know I won't be coming back. It took the end of the world we knew to bring us back together and I wish we could stay together, but perhaps that isn't in the cards for us._

 _I feel stupid even writing this letter, and putting this in the glove comportment in this car, but this is the car her father gave to me, stole from me, and she got it back. She was one of the few women in my life that actually liked this car and perhaps some how this car and this letter will find its way back to Jericho and back to her._

 _-Jake_

Jace just stared at the letter. When had it been written? It spoke of the end of the world as they knew it so that must mean it happened after the bombs. Yet he felt an emptiness within him as it hit him again how many people lost loved ones in the war. All the hard decisions people had to make and even if they were wrong or right how many people suffered because of it. He thought maybe this Jake guy made it home, maybe he found his way back to his Emily to a place called Jericho.

Maybe he lost his car in the war, maybe he just left it behind and found his way home. Perhaps he was sitting in some small town with Emily as they watched their children go. Maybe he wasn't just another one of the hundreds that died in this was, maybe his family was able to be made whole again in a way Jace's family never would.

"Emily." He found himself saying softly and an image of a woman flashed into his mind as if the woman from his dreams finally had a name. For the smallest of moments he could actually make out an image of a girl. It was like he was looking through an unfocused camera, but slowly the image was becoming clear he closed his eyes as the tried to make out everything about her, to really know who he was looking at, but then a knock on the window of the car made him open his eyes and the image left his mind competently.

He looked over and saw Sarah he rolled down the window with the hand crank.

"Come inside." She said softly, "I'm sorry I yelled."

His eyes scanned her face as something seemed to whisper within him _'wrong' 'all wrong she's wrong.'_

"Sarah I-"

"Crazy pregnancy hormones." She told him. "Can I blame it on that? You provide so much for me, if you want this car you can have this car. I won't be mad."

Jace opened the door and pushed the thoughts from his mind. He loved this girl, they were starting a family together, she wasn't wrong. She was the girl he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. _'No.'_ The voice whispered deep within his mind. _'She's not the love of your life. Remember just remember.'_ He put his arm around Sarah and walked back into the house with her the letter pushed into his pocket. His mind wondered with Jake was, what he did in the war and if Emily really was waiting for him? Cheyenne was gone now, so did that mean this Jake guy really was too?

* * *

 **AN-I don't know why this idea came to me. I shouldn't be writing a new story as I have a bunch of other's I need to finish, I don't even know if this fandom is around anymore, I just found this show on Netflix and can't stop myself from starting the whole series over as soon as a finish it again and again. Reviews of course make me write more as they are inspiration, but I also might just keep writing even if no one reads this for my self since I'm so hooked on the show.**


	2. Chapter 2

Emily stopped the old truck as she reached the Richmond farm. The car had hardly stopped before the door on the passenger side was open and the passenger jumped out.

"How many time did I tell you wait for the car to be in park!" She yelled after the boy who was already running off in the direction of the barn. She shook her head and got out to see Stanley Mimi coming down the steps of the farm house.

"Kids." Mimi said as Emily got out of the truck.

"That one is going to be the death of me." Emily shook her head as her two friends came around the truck. "He got in trouble for fighting in school." She sighed. "Again."

"Well he is his father's son." Stanley told her and instantly felt bad for the slight frown that crossed Emily's face before she quickly flashed it to a smile. A smile he knew all to well wasn't real. He had grown up with Emily and Jake he knew both of them well he could tell just by the look across either of their face what they were feeling and what they were thinking. He knew the moment he saw Jake step out of that room the day he left that he was going to go off and do something he should have been talked out of.

"He is." She said softly, "Looks just like him too."

Mimi smiled at Emily, "Why don't you come inside for some ice tea and pie. Stanley says I'm getting almost as good as his mother at making it."

"Is Chis alright out in the barn?" Emily asked

"Bonnie is out there." Mimi told her, "She will make sure to keep him in line."

Bonnie was Mimi and Stanley's daughter named after Stanley's little sister who had been killed before the war started. It was her death that started the people of Jericho to take their town back. Emily knew at time's Stanley hoped his sister would come through the front doors the way she dreamed of Jake coming home. Bonnie had broken Stanley had caused the man to do things that he still had nightmares about. No one held it against Stanley when he killed the man responsible for his little sister's death that man was an evil man. There was no good in him he killed many people to many people.

Goetz was a monster he hurt many people and would have continued to do so. Many men like him rose to power after the bombs exploded, men who used extreme force to get what they needed. Men that hurt others and found joy in it. He attacked many towns destroyed many lives, but it was their little town these people that took him down. Emily knew she would always be proud of Stanley for that. Proud of all the men that fought the corruption and kept their town safe. Just like Jake had done by chasing after that bomb headed for Cheyenne.

Hawkins had returned to town just after power had returned to town five years ago. He told them the war was over that Texas had won Cheyenne and Jennings and Rall were defeated. After his wife and children had run to him and held him his eyes met hers and she knew. She knew Jake wasn't going to come home with him.

Hawkins told her they had been separated after they delivered the bomb to Texas to prove that the government running Cheyenne was corrupt. He had been injured and taken away to get fixed up. Jake being Jake jumped right in to help where he was needed. For a time Hawkins was able to keep track of him, flying planes making deliveries for the Texas military, but then nothing. He heard his plane went down and since then he was missing an action. He told Emily is dam near impossible to find him, the computer systems were what they once were. It was to easy for people to become missing.

For some time Emily hoped, prayed that Jake was going to come home in the car of his. He had disappeared from their lives for five years in the past, just maybe, maybe he had one more in him. One more moment he could just roll into town and throw everyone for a loop. And this time when he came home she wouldn't want him to leave again. She would run to him and never let him go, not again. She would introduce him to his son and they would be a family, but that hadn't happened. The war lasted five years and now it was almost six years after that. Jake hadn't come back to town, if he was alive if he was out there he would have come back by now. She knew that in her heart. He wouldn't have chosen to leave her. Jericho had become to important to him to just walk away. It broke her heart the moment she realized that to be the truth, that Chris would never know his father.

Emily sat down at the table in the farm house Mimi placed a slice a pie each for the three of them on the table.

"So how have you been Em?" Stanley asked as he sat down.

"Oh you know, getting by. I'm at a loss of what to do with Chris, he just won't listen."

"Have you talked to Gail?" Stanley asked, "She raised Jake she should have some insight."

"Yes, she says it's a faze to just stand by the rules I have and let him know I'm here." She sighed, "I think its the engagement honestly."

"That could do it." Mimi said, "I threw a fit when my mother married."

"Roger is-" Emily looked down at her hands. After the war and things started to return to normal Roger came back. It took a long time for Emily to start dating him again, to let go of Jake and move on. She knew Chris needed a father and Roger was willing to be that for the boy. She had hoped Chris would see Roger as a father figure, even if she hadn't been dating Roger this whole time he had been a friend. She knew that Chris still seemed to think his father was out there. He grew up with stories of his dad from his uncle, Stanley and everyone else in the town. He knew his dad was a hero one of the main reasons Jericho was still here. He stood up against anyone who tried to hurt the town, he was proud of the man his father was.

The moment Chris realized Roger was her boyfriend, when Roger moved in with them was when Chris truly started to act out. Gail told her it was just an adjustment the boy would have to make over time, that he would realize one day his mother couldn't keep loving a ghost.

But Emily knew she would always love Jake in the morning when she rolled over it was his face her mind still expected to see not Roger. She felt bad for she did care for Roger she really did, but Jake had been the love of her life, even when she was engaged to Roger before the bombs and before the war some part of her always held on to Jake it was why she never moved with him to Chicago, it was why she never left Jericho because back then she had always hoped he would come back and he had. He came back to her and to Jericho when she and the town needed him the most, he came back and he fought for all of them. It took her a long time, to long in those months after the bombs went off for her to see that she was and forever would be in love with Jake.

But now he was gone, gone for good this time and she had to go on living. Roger was a good man he loved her and she loved him. Not in the same way she had loved Jake, but she had been happy with Roger once she knew she could be happy with him again.

"Why doesn't he stay here tonight?" Stanley asked noticing the far away look that kept crossing Emily's face "You and Roger go out tonight."

"I don't know he should be grounded right now."

"You already brought him here." Stanley grinned, "Maybe Bonnie can knock some sense into the boy."

* * *

"Hey Bonnie." Chris said as he came into the barn to see his best friend playin with some baby goats.

"Hey Chris." The girl said looking up at him. She looked almost just like her mother, except she had her father's blonde hair. "What brings you here?"

"Mom came to talk to your parents." He said he grinned as he sat down on a bale of hay, "She's at a loss for me again, probably asking your dad if I can work on the farm until I turn into a good boy."

"Why do you make her worry so much?" Bonnie asked sitting next to him the goats chasing after her and jumping up on the both of them.

Chris laughed as the baby goat nuzzled him looking for a bottle. "She's to busy to worry." He told her and rolled his eyes, "Roger is the one that thinks he's in control of the house. Always telling me what to do, when to do it acting like he's my dad."

"He's not an awful guy." Bonnie told him, "He seems nice."

"Yeah he seems it, but he didn't waste any time thinking he was my dad." the goat jumped over to Bonnie.

"Maybe he just doesn't know-"

"I heard him and my mom arguing the other night, I don't know what started it, I was sneaking back into the house. Roger said that if the bombs never went off she never would have looked twice and my dad again. That she would have married him and that I would truly be his son and they wouldn't have to worry about me becoming a menace to society like my father."

Bonnie looked at him Chris knew he well enough to know she was trying to find a good thing to say, she always tried to look at the bright side of things.

"Chris." She said softly, "Maybe you just heard-"

"Roger hated my father." Chris told her, "And he hates me because I look like him." He put his hands in his pockets. "My mom was engaged to Roger before the bombs after the bombs went off he was out of town. Mom fell back in love with my father in the months after." He frowned, "We was like a hawk circling as soon as he knew dad was gone he came right back in to worm his way back into my mother's heart. But I know, I know if my dad were to drive back into town again she would leave Roger in a second and I think Roger knows that too, I think I remind Roger of that fact and that's why he hates me."

"You have hated him since the moment he came to town." Bonnie said.

"I hated him the moment he started staying over at my house." Chris corrected.

"He's in your life now." She sighed, "Maybe just maybe you should try and get to know him, or at least get along with him. I mean you do have to live with him after all."

"I could go live with Uncle Eric and Aunt Mary, or grandma, or maybe here. Dad is awesome."

Bonnie rolled her eyes, "You only think that because you don't live with him."

"He fought to keep Jericho safe all those years ago, he kept this farm running through all of it and helped keep the town fed."

"Yeah but he makes you wake up at four in the morning to milk cows." Bonnie told him then using the best deep voice she could to sound like her father, "And you don't eat until all the animals have eaten."

Chris grinned at her, but then looked at his hands, "But at least he cares about you."

"Your mother cares about you."

"I know she does, I just-"

"Don't you see by you fighting with Roger you upset her? You worry her?" Bonnie asked, "Try and get along with Roger for her sake at least."

"Fine." He muttered

* * *

It took a lot of convincing to get Roger to go out to Bailey's. Roger still didn't seem at home in this town and Emily feared the day when he would ask her to leave. She knew she never could, but she always knew he would want to. He shot the mayor years ago, some people here thought he shouldn't even be allowed to return now, but she had asked and they hadn't wanted to say no to her when she begged. As if it was something they could give back to her after losing Jake.

"Hey Mary." Emily said as she walked over to the bar leaving Roger alone at their table.

"Emily!" Mary smiled, "I hardly see you here anymore."

"Stanley took Chris for the night so Roger and I had the house to our selves and thought we would go out."

Mary filled up a mug for her and glanced over at Roger who was looking at his hands at the table. "He uh looks like he's enjoying himself."

"You know how he is." Emily told her, "He saw a lot out there when we kicked him out of town." She paused, "He just needs a few more of these." She said picking up the two mugs of beer, "And he will be the Roger you remember."

Mary smiled at her friend and nodded her head. She remembered the man Roger used to be. The sharply dressed banker that had finally broken through the steal fence around Emily's heart that had been built after Jake. Before the bombs went off. Her mind went back to Emily and Jake before he left the first time, how happy they had been, best friends growing up and slowly evolved to more then that. They had been in love with each other since they were children everyone knew. Everyone thought they would end up together. Emily's father was perhaps the only one that could get in-between them. He drew Jake in to his little gang and Emily who loved Jake followed him through it all just the way her mother had followed her father. It took the death of Emily's brother Chris to break them apart. She blamed both her father and Jake for her brother's death and Jake, Jake blamed himself. He ran from the town he left for five years and no one heard of him. He returned before the bombs and slowly redeemed himself after. He became the man Emily once loved and she let go of the past and let herself fall for him once more.

She remembered watching Emily and Jake dance just beyond the bar Jake playing what Emily called 'their song.' She saw them getting closer and knew both should step away, that Emily was engaged that Roger could still be out there. Yet Mary couldn't help but smile that night as she watched the couple grow close and take a step closer to being the Jake and Emily she had grown up with. Just as luck or fate would have it that moment was when people walked into town, people who had been walking for weeks and within those people Roger had been there. He walked back to Jericho for her. Being the loyal woman she was she stayed with him even if she had realized she belonged with Jake.

When all those people were going to be kicked out of town Roger had stood up for them something Mary knew was a good thing, he tried to help his people he had walked into town. He had held Grey Anderson and gun point, accidentally shot him he had then been kicked out of town, but the townspeople allowed the others to stay. Emily was going to go with him, but Mary knew Roger could tell Emily's heart wasn't his anymore, perhaps it never was and told her to stay behind.

That was when Emily fully let herself be the girl that loved Jake once more and Mary had truly saw the girl happy even when times were hard. She smiled the way she had when she was a teenager and in love once more.

After the war when Roger came back to town, he said he had no where else to go. Emily who had been broken when she found out about Jake begged the town to allow Roger to stay that they couldn't let anyone else die. Grey had felt bad for the girl who had her small five year old boy with her, the girl that had waited and waited for the man she loved to come back only to find out he never would.

Over time Mary saw Roger always with Emily, as friends at first but Mary always knew Roger wanted more and slowly Emily allowed herself to fall for him once more. She knew as much as Roger knew that if Jake ever came back the girl would run back to his arms, but since he was most likely dead Roger seemed to hope she would be the girl she once was.

Mary knew that girl was gone maybe she never truly existed. The girl Emily had been the first time she and Roger were together wasn't truly the girl that Emily was. Rather the girl she tried to be to distance herself from Jake and her father. The girl she pretended to be. Mary looked over at the couple and could tell that they weren't as perfect as they had once been. They both had changed. Emily was closer to the girl she once was when she was with Jake and Roger, Roger was haunted by everything that happened over those years after the bombs. Sighing she turned away from the couple and went back to waiting on her other customers, wishing that it was Jake and Emily she was spying on. Wishing Jake had come home, he had saved them all, but lost his life in the process.

"Do you want to dance?" She asked Roger as she sipped on her drink. He just shook his head,

"I'm ready to go home." He told her

"We just got here Roger." She smiled as she looked at him, "We can enjoy ourselves."

He took a big swig of his drink, "I think we should move." He finally told her.

Emily looked down. She knew this was coming she knew he hated this town. "I can't."

"He isn't coming back." Roger said so low she almost didn't hear.

"What?" She felt herself ask unsure of what he really meant.

"Jake." He looked up at her his eyes meeting hers, "He isn't coming back."

"I know that." She told him, "This is home, I'm not here because-"

"Don't lie to me, I've always known that was why you never wanted to leave this place never wanted to go to Chicago with me. I always knew your heart never was fully mine and I accepted that." His voice was starting to get higher, "But he's dead he isn't coming home nothing holds you here anymore. Come with me let's start over."

"I have Chris this is his home." She shook her head, "My friends are here, Chris's family is here. He will never want to move."

"He is a twelve year old boy, it's about time you start telling him what to do and stop asking him what he wants to do." He slammed his hand down on the table and drew the eyes of a few people in the bar.

"I'm not leaving." She told him, "This is his home." Emily firmly told him. "I won't take him from Gail or Eric. He is all they have left of Jake and I won't steal him away from them because you can't face what you did here. Leave if you must but know if you want me I will never leave so either you let go of the idea we move or you let go of me." She stood to walk away but Roger grabbed her hand.

"Wait." He said softly, "I over stepped I'm sorry." He stood up and walked stepped closer to her, "Maybe we should just travel a bit." Roger said, "Go see some of the cities out there, get out of this town just to see this new world we live in."

She smiled at him, "That's something I can do. We can go see any city you like as long as we don't have to live there."

"Deal." He said as he kissed her. "Let's head home."

Emily smiled and nodded her head hoping the conversation about moving was put to rest.

"I'll go get our coats." He said as he walked away.

Emily nodded her head and sat back down. As she did the music changed and she felt her heart drop. 'Their' song began to play and it was almost like she was brought back in time.

She looked over at the bar and could remember that night, the night she realized that she never stopped loving Jake...

 _"Hey Mary." Jake said, "Can we get two more of what ever it is you are pouring?"_

 _Mary smiled and nodded her head as she carried over some of her home made moonshine._

 _"It almost looks normal in here." Emily said picking up her drink. "Like the bombs never even happened."_

 _Jake looked around picking his drink up then he turned back to her and gave her a reassuring smile, "Then lets stay in here as long as we can, huh?" She smiled back at him and as she did a slow ballad into began to play. He clinked his glass against hers. She smirked and looked away taking a sip of the liquor._

 _ **'It's been seven hours and fifteen days.'** The song began._

 _She looked back at him confused and saw his grin and couldn't help but grin back. She ran her hand through her hair, she had thought he forgot about this song._

 _"Finally remembered the name of that song." He said a little to smug. "Mary had it on the jukebox."_

 _ **'Since you been Gone.'** _

_Emily felt herself biting her lip and perhaps even blushing a little._

 _"Come on." He said standing up_

 _ **'I can do what ever I want.'**_

 _"Come on." He said again_

 _ **'I can see whoever I choose.'**_

 _She knew she shouldn't she should go home and ignore him, but that smile he had right now that look in his eyes. This was the Jake she had fallen in love with as a girl. So she stood up and took his hand. He led her onto the dance floor her hand in his, his eyes locking on hers as he spun her in front of him. Then he pulled her close, closer then they had been in years and for that moment it felt like no time had past between them._

 _ **'I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant'**_

 _The song continued on as her eyes stayed on his slow dancing just like they used to._

 _ **'But nothing can take away these blues.'**_

 _Jake pulled her close so his head was she by side with her head. She reached over his shoulder and held him close to her._

 _ **'Cause nothing compares nothing compares to you.'**_

 _It was as if everyone in the bar vanished and it was only the two of them. But she knew what they were doing was wrong. Her best friend Heather had a thing for Jake and they had kissed. She could tell Jake cared for Heather. And she had Roger, sure she didn't know if he lived through the bombs and his plane being forced to land early, he could be anywhere or he could be dead._

 _"What about Heather?" She asked not wanting to pull away from him._

 _"What about Roger he asked pulled his head back slightly so their eyes met._

 _ **'It's been so lonely without you here like a bird without a song.'**_

 _"You know how this goes." She told him both her arms wrapped around his neck. He nodded and she continued, "We should be grown-ups and walk away right now."_

 _"You're right we should." He agreed_

 _She rested her forehead on his she closed her eyes for a moment and she opened them her eyes met his and they were just as soft and kind as she remembered._

 _ **'I know that living with you baby, was sometimes hard.'**_

 _He reached both his hands to either side of her face and bushed her hair out of her face both smiled at each other._

 _ **'But I'm willing to give it another try.'**_

 _Their heads moved closer and she realized in that moment she had been waiting for this since the moment he left town five years ago._

 _"Jake!" Eric yelled_

"Emily." Roger's voice brought her from her memory.

"Huh?" She asked then put her head to her hand wondering if she had a little to much to drink.

"Ready to go?" He asked

"Sorry I was just listening to the song." She told him. She took her jacket from his hand. "I'm ready." She didn't want to stay for the rest of this song. No. This was 'their' song hers and Jake's.

* * *

 **AN- Eh not sure if I like this chapter, but here it is mostly a filler but also some important information such as Jake and Emily have a son and that Roger is back.**

 **I got one review so it inspired another chapter.**


	3. Chapter 3

Jace wasn't sure if he liked living in the city it seemed to busy to him, to many people. Sarah told him San Antonio was almost the way it once had been. She had lived in the city all her life and watched it fall and crumble and then slowly rebuild. It was evening now and the hot sun was slowly setting allowing colder evening air to cool off everyone. He walked with one hand in his pocket while Sarah held onto his other. She wore a soft yellow sun dress her baby bump just starting to show. They were walking in the San Antonio River Walk you could hardly see any scars from the recent wars left anymore. People were returning to the city, smells of the near by restaurants.

"I can't believe we are able to afford two cars now." Sarah spoke as they walked, "It's like all the things I never dared dream of having again." She smiled at him, "You have given to me again."

Jace glanced down at her and smiled back, "It's nothing really the government pays well."

"Still." She told him, "You don't remember what it was like that time in between the bombs and the war. Before government was reestablished. The world was a hard place. Our home was taken from my family, everything we ever had. I never thought we would be able to re build. I was so scared back then." She paused, "I really always had that fear in me until I met you."

Jace looked at her not hiding the surprise in his face, "Me. What did I do to take the fear away."

"The moment I saw you in that hospital." She told him, "I could tell you fought for us, you were fighting for a better world." She shrugged her shoulders, "I just saw you and felt like if that ever happens again. If those awful people come back to this city that you would protect me."

"For all we know I could have been an I.T. guy." He told her.

"The injuries you had, the scars." She shook her head, "Jace you fought for this country and even if you can't remember you won. I can see it in your eyes you're a protector, something I need." she placed her hand on her stomach and smiled, "That our child needs."

He smiled softly not convinced he could do much of anything if the world fell apart again. But if she wanted to believe that he would let her, if that was what she needed to believe then he would allow her to.

"This place is beautiful at night." Sarah told him. "Once the baby is born we won't get many nights like this."

Jace nodded his head in agreement, but he couldn't see the beauty she spoke of. Yes this place was nice, but there were to many people to many noises and to many smells. All the colors from umbrellas over tables and the music playing out of the different bars none of it truly appealed to him. When he imagined a nice evening it was jumping in the car and driving out to an empty field so far from town there seemed to be no lights left in the world. Then laying on the hood of the car and using the windshield as a backrest he would look at the stars. Pointing out the different constellations to _her_. When he closed his eyes it was almost like he could imagine that exact moment. He could almost make out the girl laying next to him as she laughed when he told some stupid joke. Her hair was blonde with a soft curl to them, her smiled was infectious. She would lean up against him as the night air was colder then here in San Antonio. He smiled. That was what he saw as a beautiful night.

"Jace?"

"Yeah?" He asked being brought out of his imagination.

"Is everything alright?" She asked and he saw worry flash across her face. He didn't want to worry her so he nodded his head.

"Yes." They drew close to a bar that had an outside set up. A song came over the speakers, it was a slow song so he pulled her softly closer to the music and spun her around in front of him.

' _It's been seven hours and fifteen days since you took your love away.'_

Together they glided across the dance floor as the old song began to play.

' _I go out every night and sleep all day since you took your love away.'_

Sarah laughed throwing her head back slightly as he grinned watching her, and then it happened almost like he was somewhere else dancing with someone else. Years ago when he was much younger. It looked almost like a prom night those eyes from his dreams came into view laughing in her place echoing every move she made. As quick as the image came it went and he was staring back at Sarah who hadn't noticed the change in him she was still in the moment of the dance.

' _Since you been gone I can do whatever I want I can see whomever I choose.'_

They moved together knowing exactly each other's movement.

'I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant but nothing I said nothing can take away these blues _.'_

He spun Sarah watching as she moved, and again it happened he seemed to be removed from the crowed he was currently in and moved into another, people were watching him dance, but he was spinning someone else, those eyes with blonde hair.

Once again the image left him and he saw Sarah spin and he couldn't help but smile at her.

' _Cause nothing compares nothing compares to you.'_

She laughed as he wrapped her in his arms again brining her close after the spin. He wanted to be as happy as her in this very moment, but her smile seemed off he usually loved her smile, but right now he longed for another.

' _It's been so lonely without you here like a bird without a song.'_

He pushed the thoughts of being unhappy from his head as their eyes locked, he loved her she was his family. He smiled down at her as she looked to him.

'N _othing can stop these lonely tears from falling tell me baby where did I go wrong?'_

He spun her again as onlookers smiled at the happy couple.

' _I could put my arms around every boy I see, but they'd only remind me of you.'_

He continued to spin her as he walked around her grinning. It seemed as she spun the image changed from her smile to the one he couldn't forget, her strait brown hair flashed to blonde hair with a slight wave to it.

' _Cause nothing compares nothing compare to you.'_

Not long ago he would have thought this to be the perfect moment, a once in the life time moment, but he felt as if he had been here before dancing to this song with the person he loved in his arms only the person wasn't Sarah. And the person was someone he couldn't remember.

' _I know that living with you baby was sometimes hard, but I'm willing to give it another try.'_

He pushed the thoughts from his head and brought his face so close to his Sarah's that their noses touched. She played with the collar of his jacket as they danced grinning up at him.

' _Nothing compares nothing compares to you.'_

She helped him pull his jacket off and toss it aside they were generating so much heat dancing they way they were.

' _Nothing compares nothing compares.'_

He felt like he could look into her eyes forever, her beautiful eyes. Even as the thought went into his mind he knew it wasn't true, he could look into the beautiful enchanting eyes from his dream forever, but Sarah's eyes were not those eyes..

' _Nothing compares nothing compares.'_

He spun her as they moved down the dance floor, and then walked a circle around her as she spun watching her every move.

'Nothing compares to you _.'_

He placed a hand on her back and lowered her into a slow dip.

' _Nothing compares nothing compares.'_

He picked her up and spun her like she weighed nothing, then lowered his lips onto hers in a passionate kiss.

' _Nothing compares nothing compares to you.'_

It seemed like his mind was dreaming even while he was awake. The song finished playing, but he wasn't in Texas anymore. He was in an old gym with a beautiful blonde girl in his arms everyone around them looked like they were in high school, all the girls in fancy dresses. He realized he was at prom. Pulling the blonde back to her feet after he had kissed her.

'That was ridiculously romantic.' She said to him

'Good.' He grinned, 'Cause we got to get out of here, I just beat up the prom king.'

They both looked in the direction of the principal who was headed in their direction.

He took her hand and the two of them took off running out of the gym both laughing perhaps a little to hard.

'Jake.' The girl said shaking her head her smiled fading to a frown. Everything around them seemed to fall away as if she was surrounded in darkness. 'Jake.' She said again but she sounded so far away. Her hand slipped out of his as she seemed to be pulled away from him. 'Jake!' Her voice kept calling until it faded away from him becoming a whisper.

"Jace?" Sarah's voice broke through. He looked down at her she didn't seem to notice what ever happened to him while they danced. "Where did you learn to do that?" She asked.

"I-" he shrugged.

"It was perfect." She smiled at him.

"Ridiculously romantic?" He felt himself ask using the girl's words from his mind.

"Yes." She leaned into his chest and stood on the tips of her toes to place a kiss on his lips. "It was. And I loved it."

He smiled at her and wished he could really feel something. So many times lately he felt like he was going through the motions. He knew how to make her smile he knew how to be romantic but deep down he felt like something was broken within him. The part that could really feel much of anything.

"Come on." She said to him, "Let's go home."

He nodded his head and led her to where they had left the car in one of the parking lots on the side of the street. He brought her to the passenger side and as she leaned against it he stood close to her pushing up against her so she was between him and the car.

She grinned "I love you." She told him kissing him. When they broke apart he said what he knew he should.

"I love you too." But couldn't help but feel that maybe it was a lie. That maybe there was someone else in the world that he loved more. He knew even if the girl in his dreams was real there was a strong possibility she had died in the war. There was also another possibility that she wasn't real and his heart was just chasing a dream.

* * *

She had finally given in to Roger slightly. He wanted to move out of a small town and into a big city. His job brought him to San Antonio most of the time so that was the city he wanted to move to. Emily wasn't sold on the idea she felt like Chris should be around his family, Jake's family. Yet perhaps it would be easier to move on without being in Jericho if she left the small town maybe that meant she could finally put Jake in her past.

She knew that was why she never moved in the past even when she was with Roger the first time before the bombs before the war. Even when she thought she hated Jake there was always a pull to keep her in Jericho. She still remembered the moment when she saw Jake for the first time in five years. She remembered stopping next to her car as their eyes met. And the feeling she tried to ignore well after the bombs went off. Yet she knew in the moment she saw Jake again anything she felt or had with Roger had ended. And that was why she never left in the past. She knew deep down in her heart she had wanted Jake to come back. She had wanted to love him again. And now she was doing the same thing she was waiting around for a man who wasn't going to come home this time. He was gone. Always the foolish man who ran right into danger she knew it was going to be his undoing. She also knew that if Jake was alive if he had survived the war he would have found a way to come home. Just like before.

So Emily had agreed to go with Roger on this business trip to see the city. She knew he was hoping she would love it and want to uproot their life. She didn't think she would, but the more she thought of moving the more it started to make sense. She knew it wasn't healthy when ever she found herself watching the street just waiting to see that old Roadrunner Plymouth pulling into town. Chis was fighting more in school and over all just not happy. Maybe they all just needed a fresh start.

She looked out the window of the car that Roger had rented it was some flashy little red car, brand new. Something that seemed to say look at me, look what I can buy. She hated it, but Roger loved the car. Emily liked classics, she like old muscle cars. To her this car felt in a way to perfect. Looking out the window she couldn't see much it was night now so it was hard to see make out more then the beautiful lights. Even now she could see that the city did have life. Maybe she would enjoy living here. It could be different from any place she had ever lived before. It would allow her to re-invent herself maybe it would allow her to breath again.

No one here would look at her like the poor girl that lost the love of her life after she had finally gotten back again. No one would see her as the girl waiting for a ghost to come home left with a child to raise on her own. People could see her married to Roger, a happy wife and they would be able to send Chris to a bigger school where no one knew his father, no one told him how great his father was no one to remind the boy that he would never know his dad. Chris could make new friends, he could be happy here. Right?

She looked over at Roger and he looked over at her and smiled, "It's beautiful here isn't it?"

"Yes." She told him taking his hand in her's. "It is." She looked back out the window, "What's that over there?" She asked

"That's the San Antonio River Walk." He told her, "We can go there tomorrow. I think you would like it."

She nodded her head and was about to turn away from the window when he eyes caught on a car. A car that made something deep within her wake up. Wake up in the way it only had once before when she saw Jake for the first time. She felt her breath catch, but luckily it was quiet enough that Roger didn't notice over the radio.

She tried to fight the tears that came to her eyes. She had dreamed of seeing a car like that one for a long time that she had started wondered if she would ever see one again she hadn't really expected to. She only wished that car had driven into Jericho and that she wasn't seeing it sitting on the side of the road. With a couple making out leaning on it.

Her mind flashed to the many times she had leaned on a similar car while Jake pressed up on her their lips locked, like that couple not caring who saw. She couldn't count the times she remembered making out, sitting on, laying on, leaning on, or inside of a similar car. She had lost her virginity in that car. She turned away and looked strait ahead of her not wanting to play over all the memories she had of the similar car they were passing.

* * *

Jace opened the door for Sarah and let her slip inside before closing the door. He started around the car to the driver's side when a new sports car seemed to speed by. It was defiantly a car to catch the eye. His eyes followed the car as it drove by, something about the car made him watch it go. Something seemed to pull at him about the car, but he didn't know what it was. He knew he never wanted a car like that, but something about watching the sports car drive by almost seemed like he missed something important. He sighed as the car disappeared down the road and ducked inside his own.

* * *

"Here we are." Roger said as he pulled up to a huge house inside a neighbor hood.

"I thought we would be going to a hotel." Emily said getting out of the car taking in the house. It seemed like one from those houses in the show she had once watched called desperate housewives. The neighborhood looked like they had block parties in the summer and Christmas decoration competitions in the winter.

"This is the house that comes with the job." Roger said, "Did I not tell you that?" He pulled the luggage out of the car.

"I believe you forgot to mention that part." She couldn't help the small bit of a anger that flared up. How could he not mention he was already staying in a house meant for a family. As if he seemed to know she could be coming here.

"Come see inside." He told her grinning.

She hesitated for a moment and then closed the door of the car nodding her head she walked inside.

* * *

Jace pulled into the driveway and put the car in park.

"That was a great night." Sarah said looking over at him placing her hand on her stomach. "We might not get many of those once this little one comes."

Jace smiled and put his hand on her stomach allowing himself to smile. He did love Sarah in the best way he could. Perhaps love wasn't like what he imagined in his dreams. Those dreams he had of holding the blonde woman in his arms, those feelings weren't real they were only what his mind made up. He never even got a clear image of the woman's face in his dreams it was as if a camera was out of focus every time he tried to remember.

Perhaps this was what love really felt like. Being with someone that you enjoy spending time with, what more could anyone want?

"I hear they take up a lot of time." He agreed.

Sarah yawned, "Well she's already using up a lot of my energy."

"She?" He asked raising his eye brow.

She shrugged, "I feel like she is a she." Then she yawned again.

"Let's get you inside before you turn into a pumpkin." Jace said opening his door and walking around to open her Sarah stepped out of the car he couldn't help but look up and noticed down the street he saw every house was the same almost identical with pretty much the same car in each driveway. All except his house because of the car he bought. The car Sarah still didn't like. He could tell his wife hated that it stuck out hated that it didn't have all the new features of a new car. She wanted one like everyone else, she was perfectly happy fitting into this life, but deep down Jace felt like it wasn't real. This all felt like some dream he needed to wake up from.

At night when he closed his eyes and thought of home it wasn't this place he saw, or this city. No he saw open green fields farms with wide open spaces. And sometimes he could almost see a town, a small town with it's people standing together strong, proud and waiting. A crowd of people beckoning him home.

"Jace?" Sarah's voice called he turned to see she was already at the front door waiting for him to come unlock the doors. He chased the thoughts of the small town from his mind and hurried to catch up to her.

* * *

 **AN- Sorry for the delay if anyone is still interested in this story. I'm back on binge watching and re watching Jericho so I'm back to writing it again. This was mostly a filler chapter to help the story move forward.**


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